Listening to one of the morning shows on radio, Dj Adrian, a resident ‘mix master’ in that media house quipped, “How long would be the distance from the beaches along the Indian Ocean, for one to be assumed she has crossed the red line of decency?” In one of the recent articles I penned down, I noted that Dead Beat Facebook page would die fast as it sprouted. We are in a fast moving world shrouded with many negative stories, ironically having everything to do with a besieged man and his sinking patriarchy ship, ponder how we forgot about Kanyari and his dirty tricks. Anyway, legions might be wondering why I am connecting issues to do with men who have refused to take responsibility after siring kids, to stripping. They are quite related. Here we are dealing with a wounded lion, and untamed for that matter, a man who has esteem issues not necessarily through his faults and in an identity crisis. A 21st century man growing in Kenya is dealing on a day to day basis with an over empowered urban woman, educated, well aware of her rights, fiercely ambitious and vibrant to the bone. Normally, when you are cornered, you cry foul. Unfortunately your crying may never be receptive to a lay man/woman. This is where psychiatrists come in. Before I proceed, don’t misquote me, I will say it for the hundredth time, any form of assault to a woman is wrong. People who study human behaviours may understand this signs and they might have seen it coming. How I wish, I would get an interpretation from Chris Hart, a pundit in this industry.
It’s always easy to point fingers at others, overlooking the plank in our eyes; its human nature. Nobody appointed busy bodies in bus terminus to be our moral police; in any case they are the first victims of whatever moral advocacy they purport to uphold. They say empty ‘debes’ make the loudest noise, I can’t agree more. We are confronted by belligerent delinquents imagining they can be the panacea to all our moral decadence, oblivious that they have insecurities to deal with. If every employable Kenyan was gainfully employed, we couldn’t be grappling with these primitive acts. Idleness is the source of all evil; with the number of unemployed youths bulging further every day, nothing could be further from the truth, the future is brink as far as our moral compass is concerned. Chivalry is dead or so it seems!
Why is the contemporary man different from our fathers and grandfathers era? What defined a man then and now, has significantly changed. In a lengthy article in the Atlantic titled The End of Man, Hanna Rosin notes the post industrial economy is indifferent to the attributes that used to give man advantage: size and strength. The attributes that are most important today are brain power, social intelligence, communication, and the ability to sit still and focus. Size and strength is catered for by robots and machines where man can no longer compete. Unfortunately these attributes named above, only favour the literate but the reverse is not true, that’s the spanner. What I mean is, chances are, a well-educated chap is more likely to be civilised than an uneducated one. Let’s zoom in to where these heinous acts take place, in bus terminus. We know who runs the show in these places with all due respect to hardworking men and women, presumably breadwinners to many families; who wake up in the wee hours of the morning to make a living in the matatu industry. In a nutshell, there is a clear correlation between level of education in tandem to opportunities that comes along with it AND one’s behavior. As a country we share the blame, our economy at the moment can’t absorb all of us. Government has its share of blame too, but we can’t sit back and imagine we do not have a role to play.
Women wear less for different reasons; some do it for personal branding, others just like it when men ogle and drool at them, some will show more skin deliberately to manipulate a man’s mind. Nevertheless, that doesn’t justify, neither warrant a man to lay his hands on a woman in the name of upholding morality. In any case, that man who shamelessly manhandles a woman is more likely to rape her or be suffering from wife batter syndrome since none of the acts involves respect. The writing is on the wall, the chickens are coming home to roast; women (ladies) are being projected as sexual tools. We might have been bombarded by much negative news as a generation, but thou shall not cave in to this level of primitivism.